Te voy a chingar

Chingar is such a versatile verb, it seems that it can be used to say just about anything.   In this case, it translates quite nice to English...

"I'm going to fuck you up"

Hopefully the only time you'll hear  this is as a joke, which is how I heard it.  The good news is it should be fairly easy to tell if someone is joking or not with this one.  And if they aren't joking, then you've mananged to get yourself into a pickle, hopefully not with something you learned from my blog, LOL.

And like everything else in Spanish, there's more than one way to skin a cat.

Voy a partir tu mandarina en gajos
I'm going to tear your mandarin orange into slices.

Te voy a partir la madre, hijo de la chingada
I'm going to split your mother you son of a bitch.

Well, our second example doesn't translate so well, but both examples mean the same thing as "Te voy a chingar"....somebody wants to kick your ass. 

Since we're on the topic of bodily harm, there's some more vocabulary that fits right in...putazos, golpes and chingadazos.  In fact, I actually discussed putazos and golpes in my other blog,  you can read the entry here.

But basically, golpes are punches or hits of the normal sort.  When you give out putazos and chingadazos, you're really handing out an ass-whooping.  You can think of the two as synonyms, but do remember they're both a bit crude.  In fact, the picture below gives you a visual image of chingadazos, but if you click the link you'll see a very entertaining video that  brings chingadazos to life.

I hope you enjoy the video, I always get a good laugh out of it. 

¡Nos vemos!

Vales para pura chingada

We have yet another phrase that involves a word that stems from chingar.  And there's a lot more to come.    But we don't want to get ahead of ourselves,  let's decipher this phrase first. 

To cut to the chase,"vales para pura chingada" means "you're not worth shit".

Vales comes for valor - to be worth something.  And not only can you use it on people, you can use it in other contexts.  Here are some more examples:

Este carro vale para pura chingada.
This car isn't worth shit.

Este pedazo de chatarra vale para pura chingada.
This piece of junk isn't worth shit.

As far as swearing in Spanish goes, this is pretty straight-forward.  Or as the saying goes "pan comida". 

¡Hasta la próxima!

Me vale madre

This phrase comes from the verb valor. 

Me vale madre is a way of saying "I don't give a damn".  Actually, it's stronger than that, more like "I don't give a shit/fuck".  

 Here's a quick chart:


Te vale madre = You don't give a shit
Le vale madre = He/She doesn't give a shit
Nos vale madre = We don't give a shit

Les vale madre = They don't give a shit

There are times when you don't need such a strong response, in which case you can drop the "madre" and say "me vale", which simply means "I don't care". You can also say "no me importa". Think of it as:


Me vale = no me importa = I don't care.

That's it!  If you speak enough Spanish, sooner or later you're going to come across this, it's actually quite common. 

Before I go, let me say that madre is a very strong word in Spanish, at least in Mexican Spanish.   There are plenty of ways to use this word, and we'll be looking at those later.

Cuidense!

Hace un chingo de frío

It's winter time, and sometimes "hace frio" doesn't convey just how cold it is.    So let's look at a few ways to express just how cold it is in a more colorful fashion.

With that said, let's take a look at our phrase for today.

Hace un chingo de frío

We know that "hace frio" means it's cold.  That part is easy.  Now lets move on to "un chingo".

"Un chingo" is a lot of something.  It's synonomous with montón -- a ton of , a lot of.   But "un chingo" derives from Chingar.  If you don't already know, Chingar and its many variations are used to add "emphasis" to things. It's a word you'll quite often in this blog, and make no mistake about it, Chingar is along the lines of the F word in English.

But back to our phrase. 

If we put everything together, we get it "It makes a lot of cold", well, more like "It makes a lot of fucking cold", when you translate it literally.  But we'd just say "It's really fucking cold".

There are other ways to talk about how cold it is, all equally rude (grosero).

Hace un frio de la chingada.

Que puto frío!

Hace un frío hijo de puta!

Well, that's it for today.  I know there are expressions we didn't talk about, like "hijo de puta" and "de la chingada", but we'll get to those expressions and more in due time. 

And I really shouldn't have to tell you to "ten cuidado" (be careful) with these expressions, but I will anyway. 

Hasta la próxima!